Both Ends of the Spectrum

There was a  flu outbreak in Cybernat Towers last week.  Those late 19th Century Egyptian tomb raiders opened sarcophagi and found healthier looking specimens than me.  ”Death will come on swift wings to those who disturb the sleep of the Pharaohs” said an inscription above one particular vault they came across.  Well the Grim Reaper would have been considered a merciful visitor chez moi.  Never mind making it to the referendum, Saturday lunchtime was looking like it’d be a step too far.  I felt as sick as a Bitter Together activist looking at his canvassing returns.

Actually that’s a daft thing to say.  BT have got activists???  Whatever has been happening over the last couple of weeks has certainly got more than a few folk flapping in the “we cannae” camp.  Even the Daily Heil were at it with a panicky “Campaign to save the UK in crisis” headline blaring out.  It certainly made a change from the mocking “Support for separation evaporating: Salmond’s dream in tatters – soon there’ll be only him and Sturgeon in favour of his crazy divorce plot” routine that we’ve become accustomed to.

So is there any evidence for this apparent shift in attitude?  Well, I had a couple of interesting encounters myself recently.  The first was during a conversation with a solid Labour voter who has the most worthwhile, underpaid job in society, i.e. he’s the driver for the local Indian restaurant who brings us our Friday night curry.  Now this man hates Alex Salmond.  In fact saying he hates the FM is a bit like saying that wee guy Messi is a bit nifty wi’ a ba’ at his feet.  Salmond is the smuggest, sleaziest, least trustworthy individual who ever walked God’s green earth.  The only reason he isn’t currently doing jail time is because he’s so adept at covering his tracks according to this gentleman who is one of the staunchest Yes voters I’ve met.

He also told me that nearly everyone in his circle will be voting Yes as well.  Whether or not they share his opinions on Alex Salmond matters not one jot – the thought of hoofing the Tories out of power up here until the Twelfth of Never is a primary consideration for most of them and too good an opportunity to be missed.

Talking about Tories brings me to Auld Jimmy, politically the polar opposite of the person above.  By any standards Jimmy has had a successful life.  He’s been retired for years, lives a comfortable lifestyle and numbers doctors, teachers and lawyers among his numerous grandchildren.  Back in the 80′s he was a big admirer of the she-devil: “Marvellous woman that Mrs Thatcher.  She’s just what Britain needs.  She’ll get the country sorted out and back on its feet.”

When Argentina invaded the Falkland Islands there was nobody more jingoistic than Jimmy.  The aforementioned Messi might never have existed had Jimmy got his way with gunboats sailing up the River Plate leveling and nuking anything that moved.

Auld Jimmy will be voting Yes in September.  Makes you think doesn’t it?  If the Auld Jimmies are moving over then it’s time to start building these imaginary border crossings and weep for your family members who’ll shortly become foreigners.

A good pal of mine has also moved from Don’t Know to Yes after attending an event in Edinburgh where Nicola Sturgeon was one of the speakers.  She was enthused by the sheer positivity and – something that’s very important to her – the complete lack of any disrespectful comments about the other side.

This brings to mind a story from our local high street where an undecided voter spoke to the people on the BT stall and promptly crossed the road to sign up for Yes.  His reasons?  “Yak, yak, yak… fat bassa that Salmond… too fond of curries… must weigh 300 pounds… how much will he weigh after separation when we cannae use the pound, etc, etc.”

Paraphrasing slightly there but you get the idea.  Not only are we moving folk from No to Don’t Know to Yes, but so are the other lot.  There can’t have been another campaign in history where both sides are bringing about identical outcomes.  And now we’re supposed to believe they’re going to be more positive?  Aye, right.  I can just imagine:

“We’re positive there’ll be no currency union… we’re positive you’ll be thrown out the EU/have to join the Euro… we’re positive all your businesses will head south.

Let’s hope they keep it up.  This is happening, folks.

A Cybernat

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15 Responses to Both Ends of the Spectrum

  1. Helena Brown says:

    Well Davy between you and the Wee Ginger Dug, you both have done my heart good this dreich Sunday morning. Another man who has done good today is Kevin McKenna in the Observer and you also got a mention, so I hope you are feeling better, thon flu is a horror, but I trust you will keep it to yourself or only pass it on to NO voters.
    I see Osborne has again said we will not keep the Pound. Well mince to him too, I do have a suggestion for your page that you run the accumulating National Debt below the clock for the referendum and say Vote Yes as the clock stops and stop worrying about this one too as it stops then for us as well.

  2. Stevie Mach says:

    It’s been a funny past couple of weeks, Dave. The annual political ‘blah blah season’ and all these new promises of more more more, that are even less than was promised last year (talking Scottish Labour here). Then they prove their Tory-card-carrying-worthiness by voting with the Tories for benefit caps. Not content with 1 in 4 Scottish kids living in poverty, Scottish Labour seem to want to strive to make it 1 in 3.
    The LibDdem Liar party ‘blah blah’ week, was, well, can’t say anything struck me as memorable, apart from Wee Wullie saying YES could win! Oh, and Tavish says ‘smile’ when passing on the doom and gloom messages of ‘Project Fear!’
    One of the few politician’s I did have a great deal of respect for passed away of course, dear old Tony, who never wavered with the wind, or changed his scruples and values with his underpants like the majority of New Labour.
    His funeral did give us a welcome break at Scottish FMQs from Lamont though.
    I actually thought no one could be as poor as Lamont for Scottish Labour at FMQs, until Baillie stepped up, even those on her own side behind her were cringing with embarrassment – and herself having tea and scones with the Tories, just shows there’s no difference at all now between the Red Tories and the Blue Tories. Surely there must be some sensible and decent Scottish Labour MSPs who must be thinking about distancing themselves from this bunch of idiots that lead the party? Come over to the light and join Scottish Labour for Independence. Once we get a YES vote, have a Labour party in Scotland people would vote for. Until then, a vote for Labour is a vote for Tory values and principles, a vote for policies that would earn them a pat on the back from Thatcher if she ever crawled zombie-like back from the grave.
    Hope you’re over the flu Dave. Was it really influenza though, or perhaps that other virus we’re told is doing the rounds!

    • admin says:

      Definitely not the Yes virus, Stevie. I’ve always had that and it feels good. ;)

      I look forward to these chancers and wasters from Liebour being booted into oblivion and a new party emerging from the ashes headed up by the LFI folk. A strong coalition between the SNP and LFI would be ideal to take us forward after the first truly Scottish elections. Hopefully the Alexanders and Murphies who’d come scuttling up here post-Yes would be seen as the opportunistic scumbags that they are and would be shunned by the electorate.

      Dave

  3. Davy says:

    I hope a good number of whisky toddys has help clear your flu Dave, they may have no medical benefit but who cares their awfa fine.

    Well its been some week and was nicely finished off today with Andrew Neil’s gutting of Alistair Carmichaels explaination of NO currency union on the politics show, followed by the First Minister bebunking the trident question proposed by the parts of the media. And then we had Willie Rennie getting de-bagged over anything the libdems said during their conference, but he still had a smile about it, just to make us feel better.

    And now I have some information for “Helena Brown”, Helena, admin is known as DAVE, I am known as DAVY, I know its a small thing but the (Y) is mine all Mineeeeeeeeeee !

    Too much good news is doing my head in.

    • admin says:

      Well they say that out of all the cures that don’t work whisky is the best. :)

      Been quite a day on Cybernats with names being stolen and sexes being changed. :)

      There’s a new blog link over on the right – Hope Will Beat Fear. It’s written by a young lady who’s still at school and will be casting her first ever vote in September as one of Generation Yes. Hopefully some folk will visit and give her some well-deserved support.

      Dave

    • Helena Brown says:

      Sorry Davy, I will remember. Always in the trouble with names, got a wee row on WOS for not putting an i in Desimond.

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